Catching up

Well it's been almost a month since I've updated the blog. I think about it often but sometimes I just want to forget all that is going on. Of course I can't do that since I am living it. The lymph node surgery went okay, I have had severe cording which limits the use of my arm and is very painful. As a result, I am back in physical thearpy two days a week to work on getting rid of the cording. Of all the pain since this started I think this is the worst. My arm gets really sore and mortrin does not help that. I work on my arm a lot myself as much as I can and it is getting better. Of course the doctors and physical thearapist tell me that this rarely happens...again I am the one in 100. I also go to physical thearpy a third day a week because my rotator cuff is still bothering me and now I have a IT band problem. I am trying to get back to running but the IT band problems is slowing me down. I do plan to participate in the Rock & Roll classic even if I have to walk.



Tomorrow I go to the doctor for my first radiation consult. So that starts soon. I am told that most people don't have a problem so I hope I can be among the most rather than the one. I will continue to work on getting my weight down. Everyone tells me I look good. It's good to hear but it's depressing for me to have the weight because I can't get into my clothes nor do I have money to buy new bigger ones. I just need to push back from the table and stop eating junk and I've been doing a terrible job at that. I do really need to loose the weight though because all of the research saids that women who are overweight (and I am over weight for my height and frame) are at a higher risk for recurrence of breast cancer. Now that I getting closer to completing the treatment, I ask myself often why this has happened to me and the best answer I can come up with is why not. It's hard to think long term into the future. I just take one day at a time. I do see other breast cancer survivors who live a long life so I know that's possible and also know that tomorrow is not promised to anyone.



I've been bothered by my scars lately and twice now God has told me that it could be worst. The first time I was complaining about the scars I saw a set of triplets on the news who had terrible burns. My scars didn't even compare. Then yesterday I saw a lady who's legs were scarred from a car accident. When she was telling about the scars she reminded me "you know where you've been but you sure don't know where going.



Well Tyler has been the highlight in my life of late. She came out of a funk at the end of her track season and kicked butt. She won three medals at state, she was voted MVP by her team members at HF and she was nominated for the 110% Atlethic Award at HF. She also received an award for participating in Track on the varisity level for four years. She will leave HF with a 3.2 GPA. I am pretty darn proud of her. She is focused, she is young and vibrant, she has a wonderful personality, she likes to have fun, she loves to dress up and dress down in the most colorful way, she loves high heels, and I am praying that life's journey will just be full of happiness, good fortune, and love. She will graduate today at 2PM. She wanted to go to church today, we won't make because of the early time that she has to arrive for graduation but we will pray and worship this morning at home. She will move on to U O I to run track as she pursues her college degree in Kinesiology.



That's about it for now. My financial picture is not much better but perhaps after radiation I can try to get back to work. The doctor did tell me that a lot of people work during radiation but didn't necessarily recommend working for me because I seem to have so many side effects with treatment. I am going to try acupunture maybe that will help get my bodyget into balance and I can torlerate things better. We'll see what will come out of the radiology consult.



Today I am going to enjoy Tyler's day!!!